From My Friend-2

I have metamorphosed to me
Dont know how.. dont know when
Searching for light everyday at the dawn
It just happened
The things that were haunting my heart

Haunting my mind...Are gone
Gone like the western wind

The past as they say has passed
Taking with it the old individual of me
The one who was so happy
The one who was so blind

...that it cudnt know

The mirage it was following
Where every smile was only faith
The reality was far worse underneath

Ignorant i was, in the realm of illusion
When the dark had consumed my shadow
Even the mirror had conspired

To show a disorted picture
I had only craved for sanity
While the insanity was too secure
And my all hopes had vanished

Beyond every persuasion

Must my subconscious has got this realised
That time has brought this present
I woke up to see the light now
That redefines my shadow
Here i can hear my echo

That no longer reverberates unanswered
Here i look at my image
Yes i have metamorphosed.

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Leaps and Falls

It's always been like this
You have been with me
In acts of rectitude
Or those of transgression
You never left me behind,
Your erring friend...
Nah i cant call me the master
Coz you are no slave
For me you are never
Just an alternative
We had our leaps
And we had our falls
We had our afterclaps
And also had some dulls
But when we defied the times
And did our deed
What i lacked i found then
With you, that speed
Balance and direction
Were close affiliates
Coming out of the union
Of the man and the machine

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For my Sister

Today when i look behind-

I find your impressions 

....scattered everywhere

In days of plenty

To those dipped in adversity...

I find you everywhere

You are one of those

Little bright shining stars

Colouring my life

With your brilliance

Guiding and supporting me

In the wilderness...

...called life

Love you Dei...

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Unlove

It all started with a glance
A simple glance, a short one
That's how i feel it did
Days passed on with
The unwrapping of selves
Each day bringing me closer
To what i found in him
In every passing moment

He was so full of life
Better to be called life itself
The whole world moved
In an orbit around him
My soul making infinite circles
Around his heavenly self
I thought i knew him better
In there somewhere

Circles of time
Of his and mine
Met and intersected
To move faraway
Asking me to move
To Unlearn, Unlive and Unlove




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Desire

With so much of love in me

For the beauty that you are

O cold, unfeeling death

You are so near

Your presence so felt

In everything around me

And yet so unreachable you are

In this perennial attempt

To reach you

What will come out...

Of our union

Out of your cold grasp

Over my arms

Out of your steel look

Over my self

Out of your icy kiss

On my cheek

The metal shines

The sharpness grinds

With all the grandeur

The shine finally makes

Its mark

On my desire 

To be yours forever...

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Impression

We had been together
As birds of a flock
We had been close
As board to a chalk
We had shared
As friends in deed
We had been complete
As the hours on a clock
We had been us

For a while i stood still
Flashes of you moving
All over around me
Could i still say that
What was left of you
Was just an impression?

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The Music of Love

I heard my name

Being called out

A thousand times

Or thousands more

But never did it sound

So divine, so special

As it did when it came

From your lips

I saw me seen

By everyone around

Numerous times

Or numerous more

But never did it look

So sublime,yet so real

As it did when it came

From your eyes

I thought often

They needed me

Often when they

Said that they did

But never did i feel

So requited,so wanted

As when the truth in you

Reached me within.... 

To create the music called love

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Craft

That road still carries

The freshness you left behind

This morning still shows

The beauty you made me find

The grass beneath me here

That remembers you once stood

This is the very place

That you had once been

The stillness in the air

That i can feel now

That was also there

Then when you made me

From scrap to metal

And then unto gold

I saw your craftsmanship grow

I, the craft, now complete

And left by myself

In this wonderful place

That you made me discover

To bask in my own glory

The halo of which is only

The consequence of your travail

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Inbox

Tryst with my destiny continued

As i flipped through life's pages

Sunny emotions dampened

By cloudy skies sans sun

And sleepless nights tormenting

As i fought with my turmoil within

Fumed within to find a respite

I searched for a pal

And got one who talked 

To me through mail 

Pleased with a downpour

In the scorching heat

I searched out my inbox everyhour

Somewhere to receive letters

Usually in an envelope

Through post delivered

Addresssed in detail

With more detail within

The details within

Getting lesser and lesser

With each passing day

Until one such day 

When there was no more

Of anything left to hold

Within or without

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Midnight Dreams

All the glitter and glamour
Of the day spent away
I toss myself on a bed
Hard and damp
From constant wear n tear
Trying hard to build
Castles in air
Whose potential's unknown
Eagle-eyed i try to capture
My Midnight dreams

The modern woman that i am
So much secure about me
Nothing in the world
Can shake my faith
In the faithlessness
That i carry on and around
Trials and tempests fail
To jolt my fidelity to my false truth

Deserted by rest
I drag my restless thing
Called body, out of the sheets
Which are saturated with
The sweat of my remorseless guilt
I dab on some cologne and straighten
My otherwise straight hair
Bend my mirror to find me appealing

As the clock strikes four
And eluded by my midnight dreams
I reach for my palmtop
To break in on my ex's ex's
Who i am sure would be
Gratified to have a healthy chat
On the topic of common interest
In the interest of world peace



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Somehow

Somehow something somewhere in me

Went to look out something outside

Searching earnestly for that something

Which couldn't be searched within

The void within trying hard to search what

It could never be by itself

Believing in that somewhere someday

It will find its complement

'Coz losing it sans effort 

Could have been

The most cruel of things

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I have to go

It was spring
And a beautiful season it was
Something that reminded me
That life is beautiful
When it comes with colour
With sprawling grasses
And green trees
And more of greenery everywhere

Exhibiting vibrant shades
Would be nature
So happy it seemed
And making me happy also
All the while...
With rhymes inducing nostalgia
And visages pure
And more of purity everywhere

Spring goes...it has to go
And i have to go
To greet a new season
Though nothing can replace spring
You may say its just a season
But it is not, certainly
Days piled together

I have to go
I know i have to
But i know the essence
Of Spring will last forever..
With me, in my soul.

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Carriage

Wheels rolled down, the winding road

Carrying on them, a carriage's load

Through the carriage's window, emerged a pretty face

Of a little girl,who had a doll in her embrace

Her name's Rose, a little girl she was

She was the darling, of the one's living

In the house, atop the hill

The house echoed, with the charming laughter

Of little Rose, with each ray of sunlight

Heard at times, would be the tinkling of bells

The breaking of clay dolls, at some other

At eating table, the clatter of spoons

And that of forks, behind all of which

In her happy self, would always be Rose 

A little doll for all, the princess of all eyes

The rose of every heart, the sweetheart of every soul

So lovable for all, so loved by all

She was like life, to all around her

Today as she proceeds

On her journey, in her carriage

The people in the house

Do know deep in their hearts,

Though people around may not say so,

It is not final.

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Thank You Readers!

Each one counts

Each word counts

Thank You readers

Thanks a lot

Coz your pat

Has made me mount

The hill of joys

Where i always rejoice

Thanks a lot for being

A part of my happiness

A part of my journey

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Eternal

Looking at you

Looking at you

What i first saw

Was your eyes

But that in itself

Wasnt true...

Coz that was

Only what was

Apparent

And what was 

Seen really was

Your soul

Shining

And transparent 

As the pure crystal 

It was lovely

To see you love

Lovable to find

The way you loved

To be loved

Loving were 

Your ways...

To make me

Love you

Lost had i

My direction

In the roaring sea

When something

Dragged my self

Back to me

My dear Father

It was you

I wonder 

What i would've been

Without you

Life-less,soul-less,meaning-less

Like a guitar

Sans chord

In your absence

When i long to have

You before me

I ask myself

Don't i already have 

You

A constant flame

Burning tirelessly

To show me way

My soul surely longs

For the days 

Gone by

But still...

It doesn't miss you

The few moments

Of enlightenment

Were as long as

A lifetime...

I didn't understand

Forever

Unless i was forced

To search for it

At the end

to find that

It was eternally

Present

Sharing

''Share a laugh, share a shoulder, share a moment....

Share a joke, share a walk, share a feeling

And see the beauty of being together!''

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Aspirations

How often do we try to fly

When we know that we cant

How often do we try to sing

When we cannot even chant

How often do we try to run

When we know that we cant 

Even walk a few steps...

How often do we try n laugh

When we don't even feel 

That we can manage a smile

How often do we try to think

When its tough even to go blank

How often we try to sleep 

When we cant even shut the eyes

How often have we tried to hate

When its difficult to even stop loving

In all that we do, In all that we feel

The us in us is against our aspirations

The we in we against ourselves...

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Argosy

'Ahoy!!Ahoy!!', called my captain

‘Come aboard my mate, my friend

See my argosy's secure and steady

Its deck'd with all that sweat can tow

Ready with the world's finery to go’

‘Climb up the bulwark and see here

See what my ship has in it for you

Embark on its deck and feel in there

What hopes and aspirations carry its air

Full with efforts of past for the 'morrow’

‘Look at her beam and at her batten

Stable and strong to face any challenge

Look at her ballast,it will let you know

Strength,which carries her dead weight 

The draught underneath amazed at her’

‘Becalm your heart,there's more to her

Than appears to the eye...that sees what

Is shown,the surface oft carries beneath

More than what it seems it can have

The beauty of my dear lies in her mystery’

‘Wait to see my ship drift away from shore

Into the roaring sea,roaring with life n' love

Of trials,Of tests,Of a never say die thing

Of hopes,Of promises,to never die losing.

See when she moves,with pride of being 

…my  pride, my esteem ,my soul mate’.

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Liberation

Among those roses,marigolds

As they sat in that green arbour

Dignified silence of a listener

In response to a fervent talker

Words were merely devices

Even symbols a mere fiasco

Before the exchange that went

On... in the core called heart

She, the woman, went on saying

He, the man went on listening

The sympathetic eyes at one end

Beholding beauty at its perfection

The softness of what surrounded

Reflecting the calm inside the centre

Found where, peace and turmoil

Alongside in each others embrace

The world which they had seen 

Seemed to have come, to its end

Just as the old mouths had predicted

To be when, they said, it comes due

And yet visible to them there was

In the horizon the dawn of hopes

From the ashes of what they called 

The End,they sought a new beginning...

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Labyrinth

You may never understand

The beating of my heart

At the sound of your footsteps

The fluttering of my eyelids

At your sight..

You may never guess

The blood gushing fast in my veins

Just at your mention

You may never understand

Me.....my emotions

Or is it that i fail to understand you

That you understand me...

Or that you haven't made me feel

That you feel about me....

Or is it that i missed the fact

That you miss our being together..

Or is it that lost in the labyrinth 
Of my own emotions
I cud never find out

That you found me as one 

Who found something in me...

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Death of an Emotion

All of that what transpired there

On the banks of a certain river

Hard it was for them to withstand

With intoxication more than of sleep

Superlatives failed to describe

The depth of their emotions

Nonexistent they seemed to be

Yet utterly present everywhere

Life seemed the heaviest thing 

On earth to carry and move about

They felt, the soul should be taken away

Or crushed, thrown into the abyss of hell

The feelings of desolation, nothingness

And lowliness of guilt, with despair added

Saying something seemed like a crime

Nothing said, pricked even more

It was the death of an emotion

The road perhaps endeth there

.   

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Core

Abandoning his aberrant anticipations

He tried to grasp the abrasive luxury

Served to him on the platter of future

So much he had and yet so much less

A fulfilling landscape to a blind man's eye

The core of his essence lost in his storm

Lifting his washed out soul with his arm

He dragged himself into the gutted crowd

Fumbling for the past that could have been

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Nostalgia

It felt so good

To be under that huge mango tree

Standing with him

In that hot humid day

It was so hard 

To avoid his boyish grin

Scattered across the space 

That was between us

It seemed so divine

To giggle at his every expression

Sanctity of the emotions

Running in my heart

It appeared so marvellous

To just look at him,

Sauntering across 

The dirty meadows

It felt also satisfying 

To part ways and move on

Sail in different ships

Far and away from each other..

...so far away today 

But in the deep recesses of my mind

I can see my anchor 

Still intact...

Myself here,

Trying to relive my fallow past.

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The Last Rites

Whatever i had, in what i had

Comes to an end

This existence, of which little

I had been in, now abandoned...

Unabashed, i look at my back

With bated breath,

Waiting for my shadow to abate

The abduction, of what's inside me

Leaving behind my abbreviation

Is in itself, an aberration

What's outside,seems like babel

I search for my bacchanal guide

Who'd perform my last rites

The daemon in me, obtaining its dagger

For the final assault....

The world now seems rigmarole

With the reversal of my self

Now complete.

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Shifting Sands

Walking on the sands

Of a deserted shore

I see flashes of what

Once stood there..

Balloons suspended in air

Bouncing heartily

In the same manner

As their owners

Small feet of small boys

Making their marks

On the shifting sand

Scattering joy in the air

Hands of couples in love

With each other intertwined

Like two creepers

Reflecting the bond within

Wives and husbands

Sitting together

Under make-shift shades

Chattering about the world

..i find today no marks

No bond,no chattering

The void in the landscape

Haunts my mind

The beauty of nature

Still intact

On to which added

The ghastly silence...

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Give me a word

Give me a word

To think upon

When i have

Nothing in mind

Give me a word 

To pause and look

When the world's 

Moving too fast for me

Give me a word 

To make use of

When i need 

To do it most

Give me a word

To get comfort from

When i am weary

From the deeds i have done

Give me a word

To caress my heart

When my heart

Aches with you apart

Give me a word 

To meditate upon

When my mind

Is rambling in the wild

Give me a word

For the sheer beauty

Of what the word 

Is by itself.... 

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Goodnight...

Its so simple for you
But its hard on me
To see what 
I never want to see

Its easy for you

But difficult for me
To be what
I never want to be

Its happy for you

But its sad for me

To feel good

When you set me free


Its so simple 
For you to say
Goodnight dear
And you go away
Its so hard 
On my part here
To think that

You'll never again be near...

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Masks

Shattered masks spill out coarse mud

Unveiling within a new bud

Feeling hesitant to come out

Is inside an innocence

Not ready to shout

A faith on a fragile thing

Is bound to end its being

Old flowers are bound to die

It isn't something

On one to cry....

Come out and see there's the sun

Standing outside is a new morn

Give it a try

For you shall never repent

A day which is well spent

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Serenity

I lay on my back

In the  mild coolness

Of a  summer evening

Infront of me

The vast expanse

Of the night sky

A big eucalyptus tree

hidding a part

Of me from the world

Looked as if

It was going to fly

Crickets jumped

From here to there

Some leaves rustling

In the breeze

Beckoning every

Little thing around

To come and dance

with the serenety

Of the time and space

Come on, they said

Come, give it a try..

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Whispers

Clouds whisper by my ears,

As if they have a sweet secret

Confiding in me ...

Their secret confidante,

Things from far and near

Things good and bad

Telling me...

That what may seem distant
May actually be too close,

And what too close may be too far.

And when they relate

To me, stories from faraway lands

They often invite me

For a ride on their back

To take me through time

And across the space

To some warm, forgotten place

Sometimes they warn

That more of waiting

May ruin the result

And too much haste

May ruin the wait

And too much of everthing

May make not much of anything

Clouds understand the world

As i so believe

I listen to them with a keen ear

And when they set to depart

I ask them to come another time...

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My Way To Damnation

Remorseless tempests

Had pleasure in uprooting me

From my very core

To leave me shaken and spirit-broken

Dragging my spirit

Inflicting on me verminous wounds

Lashing the fury

Of hell and damnation

Wrangled with life's uncertainties

It pained me..

To see bitter fruits of my garden

Leaving bitterness in my soul

I, seething with guileless venom

Trying everything but failing in each

Fate distorting my otherwise grotesque visage

Tying the final knot

On my grizzled fantasies

I search for my grindstone...my guillotine 

My way to damnation

The world looks down 

With contemptuous eyes

As i bear fortune's grimace.

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Sorry for no posts

Sorry for being inactive for so many days....Actually got a bit busy in work and studies which will continue 

for yet some more days...But i promise to return with a lot more for all of you in the coming weeks..

Silver drops

Drops of silver

Dance at my window pane

The world seems

No more the same........

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Promises

Promises of unblemished moments
Promises of moments, moments of truthfulness,
Togetherness and trust...
Of times of sharing, bonding and reliving
Of days ,and nights...of twilights...

Mountains of promises still lie
Gathering dust
Of broken hopes,torn wishes
And all that's lost....

Promises of one who seemed like heaven
Like heavenly nectar, heavenly light

Promises are but promises
And as somebody said...
Promises are made only to be broken.
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....From my Friend

....and all of a sudden,
slipping out of my otherwise sticky hands
are grains of sands...
which are what , they all call words

so unfaithful they are....
grinning at me,
as i try to grab them by their tails
they unleash....despite my futility
to bask in their glory, in her eyes
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